First I want to express a heart felt thanks to my Singaporean friends who made my trip so enjoyable and meaningful. I definitely experienced Asian hospitality first hand! While the list is too long to capture everyone, I want to especially thank Chung How, Stacy, Barry, Janette, Yau Tian, Amy, Oo Wai, and everyone else that I have failed to mention. You guys were great and definitely the highlight of my trip to Singapore. Really, relationships are far more precious than sights, especially when you share experiences together! I am deeply grateful to your friendships and your willingness to be patient with an overly talkative individual who was never afraid to invite himself to any/all happenings! Take care and see you all soon next year!
I also want to thank Maranda and my son Kieran for letting me travel halfway around the world for a full month. Their patience and love carried me many a lonely day, they are truly at the very heart of anything I do.
And now a few more random thoughts on hospitality. The Asian emphasis on respect and hospitality was evident even in less likely places, like the service I experienced in my apartment suite. With full room service (food if required, laundry, cleaning, etc), I encountered many of the hotel workers, yet I can say that every single one was exceedingly courteous and friendly. Now granted, this is a five star hotel, so perhaps my sample was artificially weighted by selective hiring, however even when I have experienced similar service in the states there is often a bit of resentment that one can pick-up under the "friendly mask." I have especially noted this with other men around my age. However, in this stay I only found sincerity, try as hard as I could I did not pick up hidden resentment or a sense of "I am only doing this for you because I am paid!" Instead, each person seemed genuinely courteous, beyond the point needed for their job.
This same impression was re-inforced many times over, enough to convince me that respect for others is deeply ingrained in the culture. Of course I had heard this before, but had never experienced it myself. I was quit curious if I could see past the "facade," but at least in the majority of cases, it seemed to be an inner quality, not just and outer quality. How wonderfully refreshing! Additionally, when giving you something the Chinese use both hands and dip their head in a gesture of respect. A small thing perhaps, but over the course of a day as a "consumer," it was amazing how much it impacted my mood.
Perhaps the most dramatic contrast was my flight from Tokyo to the U.S. I changed planes in Tokyo and had an early experience that brought to my attention that the flight attendants were no longer from South Asia. Early in the flight drink service was provided. My seat companion (a Roman Catholic Ph.D student in religious education from Singapore) and I were both a bit groggy and surprised by the sudden presence of the drink cart. My companion looked up at the flight attendant and said "sorry" (in the British usage) to indicate that he hadn't clearly heard her request. She stood with hands on her hips and said with a surly edge to her voice "Honey, take a look, why do you think I am here!" Abashed, my companion quickly requested a fruit juice and I did the same. As she moved on down the aisle, he exchanged glances with me, indicating his surprise at her response. I felt a need to explain that in the U.S., her "attitude" was not terribly uncommon and was "taken with the turf," but instead I just nodded my head indicating my own frustration as well.
Now certainly I have had many excellent experiences with flight staff in the U.S., but this one example would simply NEVER happen in Asia, based on my experiences, as it would be profoundly out of character in a place where respect for other's is so highly valued. Food for thought, and certainly a refreshing experience for someone like myself with a strong penchant for sarcasm!
Later,
Ken
