Thursday, December 07, 2006

Home Again

What a wonderful feeling it was to feel the plane touch down in Dulles after 21 hours in the air (with a brief lay over in Tokyo). A short cab ride later (actually, it felt exceedingly long!), I arrived home. Because me return was a day early (unbeknownst to Maranda), I wasn't sure if anyone would be home at 4:00 in the afternoon. Seeing the car was gone, I paid the cab driver and entered the house with my luggage expecting to wait for Maranda and Kieran's return. What a wonderful surprise to be greeted by our babysitter and Kieran!! When I entered the door, Kieran's response was complete surprise, he took a stunned look at me and then ran out of sight into the Kitchen. He made the loop through the dining room and came back into the room, but wasn't able to look at me (his face still clearly showed his surprise). He stood pointing at the fish tank, still unable to grasp my return. I crouched next to him, giving him time to adjust to my sudden return (Maranda hadn't prepped him yet, expecting me to return the following day). He pointed earnestly at the fish tank, intensely babbling and waving his arms.

After a few minutes of calming down, Kieran was finally able to turn and look up at me. My heart melted when I offered my arms to him and he slowly reached up to me. As I sat holding Kieran, his warm body felt both familiar and strangely foreign at the same time. I could tell he was feeling similar emotions, as he was still struggling to look at me but was reaching his hands back to touch my arms and my face.

The baby sitter left and I sat basking in the presence of my son, from whom I had been parted for four eternally long weeks! On a developmental level four weeks is a very long time in a one year old's life, clearly he had changed both physically and mentally. Kieran sat in my lap, not clinging but holding very still, as if he was afraid to move in case it was all just a dream. I talked to him and told him how much I missed him and how beautiful he was. His body began to relax in my arms and he began to turn his face up to mine. After a few more precious minutes, we went and took a warm bubble bath together, a wonderful relief for a wearied traveler and an amazing experience of re-uniting with my son.

Now, a full 24 hours later, the feelings of warmth and joy continue. My son is so precious, in ways that far transcend my meager words. This morning when he first awoke he again expressed surprise to see me, although without the hesitation of the day before. He immediately began to feel my face as if to validate that the prior day had not been simply a dream. Then with coos of joy he rubbed his face against mine and draped his body across mine, literally pulsing with love for his father, and his father reciprocating the same.

I have much more to write of my home coming and further reflections on my trip, but I will save these for a later post.

Ken

3 comments:

WMS said...

Ken, this has to be the most tender expression of loving fatherhood I have ever read. :) I have chills. And more chills.

Anonymous said...

Wow. That is the sweetest thing ever *tears*. It was really hard to see Kieran miss his Daddy and try to reach the computer screen to kiss Ken's picture. Everytime Ken called, and sometimes even when he didn't, Kieran would put the phone to his face and snuggle it and kiss it. It's sooooo nice to have the real thing home! Next time we're going with you!

Maranda

Melissa said...

I agree with Israel--what a moving story! That must have been quite a moment for little Kieran to see his daddy walking through the door after a month of being gone.